Sunday, December 12, 2010
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Ms. Alicia Bell
Dear Alicia,
It's always hard to say goodbye to those we love...and today is no different. I couldn't even imagine your life ending so soon and with so much pain. I prayed daily for a different outcome, thinking that you would be the exception, the miracle!!!! But alas that wasn't in God's plan.
As I sit here pondering how much I should've done in your last days here on earth, I'm sadden by my narcissism. But when I really think about it, I wanted to call, I just didn't know what to say....how to act or what to talk about. Though none of that should have mattered, my emotional immaturity got in the way. AND I'M SORRY!!!
Ms. Alicia you will truly be missed, and your accomplishments here on earth will surely bring lasting happiness to those around you.
LOVE,
J
It's always hard to say goodbye to those we love...and today is no different. I couldn't even imagine your life ending so soon and with so much pain. I prayed daily for a different outcome, thinking that you would be the exception, the miracle!!!! But alas that wasn't in God's plan.
As I sit here pondering how much I should've done in your last days here on earth, I'm sadden by my narcissism. But when I really think about it, I wanted to call, I just didn't know what to say....how to act or what to talk about. Though none of that should have mattered, my emotional immaturity got in the way. AND I'M SORRY!!!
Ms. Alicia you will truly be missed, and your accomplishments here on earth will surely bring lasting happiness to those around you.
LOVE,
J
Thursday, February 4, 2010
A theory on happiness
So.
Here I am settling into St. Louis life, finally working (in a upwardly mobile fashion), got the boo situation on deck, headed back to my fighting weight and I've found a couple people to hang with occasionally. One would think that everything is moving along great for me, right? Well....I've been chewing on this little theory for the last couple of years that has me thinking differently.
Question: Does happiness work on a balance system? Are we only allotted a certain amount of happiness at time? I'll give you a little background, every moment prior to this one I've been missing one, two, or three of the things I listed above (not that this is an all inclusive list, but of course these are key to a 26 year old WOMAN). Leaving me to assume, every aspect of your life CANNOT equate to happiness, simultaneously....
Think about it...we are always complaining about something, even if everything else in our life is great! And complaining definitely = unhappiness! For the longest, I would constantly complain about starting a career, even though I had a man (turned out to be a loser), in great shape and not a debt to my name...when a career had no choice but to come.
Then, finally after YEARS of self diagnosing I thought I'd found the secret! I broke out of my mold and took a risk (Moving to St. Louis). And for the last three months I'd reached a simultaneous state of happiness, debunking my little theory...but apparently I missed the elephant! And now it seems I've tilted the balance of happiness. It would be my luck that the one thing falling off the scale, is one thing I would've chose over everything.
Even though my study has a small sample size....I'm concluding it a FACT!
Peace
Here I am settling into St. Louis life, finally working (in a upwardly mobile fashion), got the boo situation on deck, headed back to my fighting weight and I've found a couple people to hang with occasionally. One would think that everything is moving along great for me, right? Well....I've been chewing on this little theory for the last couple of years that has me thinking differently.
Question: Does happiness work on a balance system? Are we only allotted a certain amount of happiness at time? I'll give you a little background, every moment prior to this one I've been missing one, two, or three of the things I listed above (not that this is an all inclusive list, but of course these are key to a 26 year old WOMAN). Leaving me to assume, every aspect of your life CANNOT equate to happiness, simultaneously....
Think about it...we are always complaining about something, even if everything else in our life is great! And complaining definitely = unhappiness! For the longest, I would constantly complain about starting a career, even though I had a man (turned out to be a loser), in great shape and not a debt to my name...when a career had no choice but to come.
Then, finally after YEARS of self diagnosing I thought I'd found the secret! I broke out of my mold and took a risk (Moving to St. Louis). And for the last three months I'd reached a simultaneous state of happiness, debunking my little theory...but apparently I missed the elephant! And now it seems I've tilted the balance of happiness. It would be my luck that the one thing falling off the scale, is one thing I would've chose over everything.
Even though my study has a small sample size....I'm concluding it a FACT!
Peace
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